One of my kitties is lost, and its all my fault

My kitty Sherlock got outside yesterday.  I'm 99% sure its cause I didn't quite get the kitchen door all the way latched and so it blew open, and out he went.  We can't find him. Its been more than 24 hours now, getting closer to 36, and I'm devastated.  He was my special kitty.  I found him living outside as a very young kitten, and got him inside. In a couple weeks had a very nasty ear infection that darn near killed him.  I mean I was giving him water and tuna juice for a couple days to keep him alive until the antibiotics kicked in.  Since then he walks with a tilted head I think as a result from damage from that ear infection.  And now he's lost, outside, probably dead by now, but if he's still alive, he's scared and hungry and I can't find him to help him.

I've been alternating between trying not to cry cause I'm around people, or sobbing like a toddler who lost their teddy bear. I was walking around outside about an hour ago, sobbing, while putting the cat food in the dish we feed the cats in over and over hoping he'd hear it and maybe come to get food.  He didn't.  So I sobbed even harder as I went back in the house.

The weather is going to turn to crap tomorrow, so if he's not already dead, which is a good possibility, thanks to morons who think they need to drive 70mph on the highway we live on, or the fact we have fields around out house and raccoons and coyotes think cats are things to kill, he will freeze to death.

I hate thinking he might have been killed by a wild animal, scared panicked cause I couldn't get that fucking door shut. My poor kitty. I miss him. I miss him so much.  He would sit and look out our kitchen window with me in the mornings, or sit on the deep freeze and paw at us as we walked by so we would pet him.  He also loved to go into my gym with me.  He'd sometimes sneak in little scamp.

Here he is in the dog kennel.

Here he is helping me play video games.

I'm going to miss my Sherlock.  Please come back